Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
