Fuck appropriateness.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
