Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
My cat gives me a boner
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
just found out that she named her cat after me.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
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