Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize