am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
