This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
