so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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