sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize