I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
