my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
