During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize