just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize