Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize