its not stalking. its research.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
