i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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