what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Randomize
