dude i'm inner monologue high
Don't EVER smell your tampon
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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