let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize