Please, let me fuck your mom
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
