I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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