I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Randomize
