You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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