So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Randomize
