new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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