Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
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