dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize