I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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