do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
