Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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