i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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