Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
