I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
