Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
