Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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