I puked a lego.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
