she was so not down for the gang bang
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize