I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
