wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
