let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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