I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
