Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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