If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
