no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize