Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
