I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Randomize
