I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
