I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
