they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
