They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
