oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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